My eyes have been blinking my body breathing and my heart beating for over 25 years now. I have had the same 4 sisters and the same two parents, although my family continues to grow and occasionaly it shrinks. Ive had other people in and out of life, my life is like a carousel, people get on for the ride and then they get off, some come back for more and some never return. But there are the people that get on and never chose to leave me and it is from them that I have learned this:
I am STUBBORN. I am a mess. I cant hold a tune and cant dance to save my life. Im akward and weird. I can be annoying. Im occasionaly shy. Im disorganized. Im lazy. Im a complete dork. I have my insecurities... < this is so very true. I am HARD headed. I many times cannot stand up for myself. Im always reading way to far into things. I AM NOSEY!!!!!! I ramble. I mumble. I talk to quiet. I talk to loud. I am way to tall. I like to eat. I snore. My car is always a mess. I leave trails. I hate to wear shoes. Im socially akward. I care far too much what other people think. I let others control way too much of me. I give horrible directions. I never use a timer. I let dishes sit in the sink. I let (not make) my kids eat dog food. I have a big nose... and a big butt. I can hold a serious grudge. i have horrible timing for things. I say completly inappropriate things. I have no sense of style. I use way to much salt. Im GRUMPY. I find it easier to do things MY way as opposed to the right way. Im crazy and a little bit wild. I can not pay attention. I try to do things way to fast. Im a horrible driver. I never check my oil or my tires. I care way to much about what others think. I talk crap when I have no place too. I come off rude and stuck up. I get mad over things I shouldnt. I never speak up. I would make a horrible business person. I hate putting laundry away. Im a complete airhead. I let my kids get away with way too much. Im not all that fun and sometimes my eyes are the only thing that will speak whats on my mind.
But if people cant love me for all that. then they dont get to love me for anything else because I love unconditionaly, Ill always be there for someone. My heart doesnt know how to say no. When I smile it is 99% of the time genuine. Ill make you absolutly anything you want to eat. I almost always can find more good in a person than bad. When I speak its the truth. When I love its everything. When I share its sincere. When I clean its thorough. When I give, Its everything I can. When I laugh its true. When I promise its with the best of intentions and my kids are absoultly the best part of me.
Yes the bad definetly out wieghs the good. But thats only because I am human. I am not super special... but I am special to a handful ofpeople. I dont have to be loved by everyone because not everyone can handle it. But I am loved by the right people, and that is all I need. so if you cant handle the worse of me dont expect the best of me! If you cant love the bad in me you dont deserve the good in me! I am who I am I havent changed yet... I kinda dont think im going to now!