Saturday, October 5, 2013

D A T I N G !!!

The Seasons are changing, the hot days are now cool, the tank tops are now only working for the day and are getting covered up by sweaters at night, the flip flops are off the shelves and the most amazing boots are now everywhere (Yes, I Love dem boots) there are Pumpkin Spice Lattes and Apple pie, Hay rides and Halloween decor and of course one of my favorite fall events..other than the fair... the bows, the arrows, the rifles and shotguns come out, the weather cools and the hunters prepare to go out, and then of course there is the overwhelming amount of men all of a sudden grocery shopping for their days away at elk camp, filling their carts with beer, hot dogs  beer, cupcakes, beer, jerky, beer and whatever other junk food they find momentarily appetizing. But even with all this greatness.  I usually am sad to see summer go. I love the Sun, my cut off jeans and Lord knows I love Summer nights. but this year I am beyond delighted to see the leaves begin to change and the pumpkins appear on doorstep and this season change. Seasons are one of the most Beautiful creations and the change of Seasons is a gift straight from our wonderful creator. 

There was a time that I never thought that I would be here. Here living life Single. Although I now declare myself Single on my taxes and my official facebook status states Single(because well nothing is ever official until it hits Facebook ;) ) I am not "single" I am, and yes this is my self given title " The girl not in relationship, some consider single but is not because single= one,  but she has 3 kids and a dog named Rue who may be needier than any other male on the planet" so the phrase " its complicated" is much better suited for this girl. not because I am in a complicated relationship, but because my situation is complicated. 

                                                                 ----Needy Dog-----

When I first stepped foot out of the courthouse after that finalizing court day last June, I had no Idea what to expect. I knew that from that moment on I was then officially a "divorcee" a "single mom with 3 kids at the age of 25": Not that I'm complaining... I was actually pretty dang happy as I got in my car and drove to work. But I had no idea what awaited me. DATING IS  SCARY!, Its hard and confusing. it threw me so out of comfort zone, Its worse than standing in line at McDonald's smashed between a bunch of fat people waiting in line for another cheeseburger, or getting pushed to speak when you had no idea you were supposed to, heck its just bad! 
Of course I didn't go straight into the "dating world" I actually ended up finding myself quickly in a relationship. A relationship in which I Learned many things from and spent the first 1.5 years post divorce in. Postponing my dating life even more. 
Before I had gotten married I had never really dated... at all. I had Boyfriends, I had my first love and I had that whole " high school Sweetheart" experience... but never did I date. I guess that's what you get when you Marry at 19. 
Needless to say... I AM ... or until recently  WAS a "dating Virgin" at 26.. yes it could have been worse. I could have been 40 and earned that whole 40 year old title" 
(as hippie as this sounds here we go(I like metaphors)) So my season is changing,  the sun is shining on me now, the cold is over and I'm moving on. I'm what you would call " dating" its a hard world out there. its almost like a game.. wait I take that back, It is a game. But if I have learned anything it is that no matter the game, if you play, your gonna get played. What happened to the straight up of things? The honesty, the straight forwardness. The way I see it, dating is like stinking politics, and its just as corrupt as the government. When you live in a small town, dating someone is the same old thing, its old before its new. Dating out of town is refreshing.. but just that...they are out of town. Its just difficult, there is no assurance of anything. maybe this is Gods way of saying " Have faith and trust in me". Its way to easy to fall back into "comfortable" but comfortable is not where I am intended to be. 
Though I'm thankful for this time in my life, I'm also thankful  that God has shined his light upon me enough to walk me through some great lessons of life before I got to this particular place, because its not me as a "single" person walking through this, its me as   " The girl not in relationship, some consider single but is not because single= one,  but she has 3 kids and a dog named Rue who may be needier than any other male on the planet" and well those three kids and the neediest dog on the planet are walking this with me. 
Thank you God, for blessing me with wisdom, understanding, and peace, as well as this season in my life. 

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